We’re back again, but our fearless co-host is missing. Ernie’s wife, Linda, had a medical procedure, and he is looking after her. We wish her a quick recovery; our prayers are with them both.
Tonight, seven of us ventured forth to meet at the firehouse.We opened with a discussion about how to describe how a person speaks. For instance:
When they got up, Annika hugged her and whispered in Russian, “Good luck, Natasha. I’m sure you’ll do well.”
Or, should it be written:
When they got up, Annika hugged her, “Good luck, Natasha, I’m sure you’ll do well,” she whispered in Russian.
Both seem to work, and I can’t find a rule or preference on what works better, but our group came up with some advice. If there is a definitive way of speaking in a language other than the language the piece is written (in this case, Russian is spoken but written in English), the first example would appear to work better because it defines the statement as being spoken differently than written. The second example makes the reader wait until after the statement is made before revealing the language in which it is said. The same would apply to using a territorial accent or brogue. Making our readers understand what we are writing is paramount, and readers might unconsciously attribute an accent or way of speaking to a character who speaks a language. That could lead to confusion in the reader’s mind and cause them to stop reading. However, you are the author and must decide based on your preference.
Now you know what we think. Does it matter?
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We moved on to the reading portion of the meeting. Three of our writers had work to share for discussion and critique.
Leading off was Bruce Haedrich. His newest work is entitled Aquatania–The Silent Planet. After reading the opening at the last meeting, Bruce received some suggestions and critiques about the opening scenes. Tonight, he presented the rewrite of the first two chapters. This time, the work received only a few minor suggestions and reads much better in our minds.
Don Westerfield is a poet’s poet. Reading two poems, his words struck home to all who heard them. In his work Tomorrow, we see things we wish we could have done and envision the hopes we might still accomplish. Entitled Another Me, the second work could have been written about any of us. On the surface exists a person whose outward persona is who we are seen as, but inside, dwelling deep within, is another person. One who secretly wants to live a different life, be it good or bad, doesn’t matter; it’s different from our life.
While recuperating at home, James Kelly had plenty of time to write. Tonight, he brought the latest chapter from his McKinzie clan saga. Entitled, Ranch Hands, Renegades, and Rich Men. Meeting in a Washington D.C. Hotel, Asst. Secretary of the Navy Theodore Roosevelt meets with Coronel, soon to be General, Lenord Wood, the leader of the U.S. Army’s forces preparing to attack the Spanish troops in Cuba during the Spanish-American War. Roosevelt is seeking permission to form an outfit that later became known as The Rough Riders. Jim’s research is exhaustive. He writes the story as it happened concerning the actual characters in his tale. He inserts characters like the award-winning author John Jakes. Jim tells a story instead of writing a history book. By the way, John Jakes died here in Sarasota on March 11, 2023. He was ninety years old.
We adjourned a little early, but it was a productive evening, and we look forward to our next meeting on September 20. If you write, remember to READ, and KEEP ON WRITING!
