September 20th and October 4th, 2023

I’m glad to be back after suffering from an injury last month. I missed the September 20^th meeting, but my fearless companion, Ernie, gave me the notes he took. I will attempt to bring you up to speed now. Thank you for your patience.

 ***

 Vacations, poor weather, and summer in general take a toll on the attendance of our little group. Still, six intrepid writers showed up this week. Ernie led off a discussion during which he read the author’s notes in John Sandford’s book Ocean Prey. Sandford explains some mistakes he’s made in writing this and past books. We’ve all made mistakes. Hopefully, we caught them before the book went to publication. But nobody’s perfect. We must search for errors in our work with editing and research before attempting to publish. If you rewrite or edit, inspect all parts of the work that might refer to the changes made. Sometimes, changing single letters or numbers can make the whole work come under scrutiny and lose the reader’s interest.

 

In the reading portion of the meeting, Peter McNally led off with a new chapter in his memoir, Rewired. After a Gran Mal seizure in the driveway of his home after returning from a workout at his gym, he wakes up in the hospital. Confused and frightened, he pulls the ventilation tube out of his airway and tries to get out of bed. He hears Code Blue announced as a medical team rushes into his room. The writers present tonight agree Peter uses excellent descriptions in his writing despite the challenge of having suffered multiple strokes and seizures, all of which have affected his memory.

 

Don Westerfield is a poet as well as an accomplished prose writer. This week, we were privileged to hear two of his poems. Upon the Wind urges the reader to “fling your worries upon the wind” and “Waste not a moment with useless tears.” Personally, it sounds like good advice. Have You Wandered is the second poem in which the question posed in the title addresses all the what-ifs in one’s life. Can we ever do anything about those oft-regretted but unchangeable events?

 

When Dennis Cathcart took the floor, he read of those who still adhere to the principles or actions of the past. Are we wrong to do so? Are there advantages to doing so? Have times really changed so much? Was this piece about the author? We all wonder but realize the past is bound to repeat itself if proven effective.

 

In his newest project, Aquataina, The Silent Planet, Bruce Haedrich introduces us to The Prometheus Project. In Chapter 3, Karl makes a pitch to enroll Natasha. As he explains the project, he sees she is willing to join the group of candidates he has validated to save humanity from inhalation by the massive remains of a moon from a planet named Janus. Bruce has a great imagination and the skill to make his story believable.

 

The continuing saga of the Mackinzie family unfolds in the latest work by James Harold Kelly entitled Tremain, as we follow the adventures of the young Sioux adopted by the Mackinzies after the death of his father, Shadow Hawk. Tremain serves as a scout for Teddy Roosevelt and joins the Rough Riders as they embark on their mission to Cuba.

 

This is what you missed if you weren’t there.

 

NOW FOR THE LATEST MEETING – OCTOBER 4^TH, 2023

 

Although hobbling along with the use of a cane, I made it to this meeting. I sorely missed not being here for the last one, and I do mean sore!

We started the meeting with Ernie leading a discussion about the importance of a good opening line. Do the first words of a story grab your attention? The opening line leads to an opening paragraph, an essential part of any story. Your work might never get read without those opening words garnering the reader’s attention. What about the last paragraph? Some believe it is equally vital, especially if you want readers to look for your books or stories. Each word in your work is essential, and each section of your writing has to hold the reader’s attention. Choose each noun, verb, and pronoun carefully while paying close attention to your use of adjectives and adverbs.

 

Our reading portion started with Bruce Haedrich reading Chapters 7 and 8 of Aquataina, The Silent Planet. Mark questions Karl about the spaceships the project, a coalition of seven nations, is building. His questions are challenging to answer, leading Mark to discover the actual object of the Prometheus Project. How will you keep the public from finding these ships will take a select group of humans to a distant planet and populate it with a strain of humans picked specially for the mission? Mark’s dislike for Karl blossoms into hatred, especially when he finds out Natalia has agreed to join the expedition. What happens next?

 

Ernie Ovitz returned us to the Roman Empire in the fourth century as Constantine sent his emissary, Bishop Ossius, to Alexandria to quell an uprising in the Christian ranks. Ossius requests Bishop Alexander not to attend the upcoming synod. The request, considered a command from the Emperor, is devastating to the church in Alexandria.

 

Two poems by Don Westerfield are always thought-provoking. A Whisper on the Wind shows the reader how love can come silently, build to a crescendo, and fall away as quietly as it came as one partner drifts away. As I listened to Shadow Song, I felt the words within myself. I can now see and beg forgiveness for things I am not proud of as time passes and my time on earth grows shorter. The Poet says, “Still, reminisce can I of passions I enjoyed so long ago.”

 

Birthday Cakes by Scott Anderson triggers fond memories of past birthdays baked with love by a mother. A horse-drawn fire engine, an expanse of deep blue water, a mountain to climb, peanuts, and cracker jacks fill the memory as another birthday approaches. A deep abiding love is still felt even though the mother has passed; her presence is felt at the sight of another cake.

 

There was a spring in his step as Richard Cope approached the lectern. When he began to read, the words came in machine gun-like rapidity. Bad Luck #9 could be easily made into a blues song with only the addition of a couple of refrains. The same goes for the second poem, Fiddle Me a Tune, as the last wish of a dying man; the timbre and pace of the words made me hear music.

 

Well, that’s about all I can muster for now. As vacations end and the weather cools, we look forward to seeing more of our writer-friends at the meetings. The more attendees, the less time we have to read and listen to critique. To be fair to all readers, ensure you can read your selection in four to five minutes, and only read if you can stay for a complete meeting. We hope to see you on October 18^th at 6:30 PM in the Nokomis Fire Station Training Room. But above all – KEEP ON WRITING!

 

September 6th, 2023

We’re back again, but our fearless co-host is missing. Ernie’s wife, Linda, had a medical procedure, and he is looking after her. We wish her a quick recovery; our prayers are with them both. 

Tonight, seven of us ventured forth to meet at the firehouse.We opened with a discussion about how to describe how a person speaks. For instance:

When they got up, Annika hugged her and whispered in Russian, “Good luck, Natasha. I’m sure you’ll do well.”

Or, should it be written:

When they got up, Annika hugged her, “Good luck, Natasha, I’m sure you’ll do well,” she whispered in Russian.

Both seem to work, and I can’t find a rule or preference on what works better, but our group came up with some advice. If there is a definitive way of speaking in a language other than the language the piece is written (in this case, Russian is spoken but written in English), the first example would appear to work better because it defines the statement as being spoken differently than written. The second example makes the reader wait until after the statement is made before revealing the language in which it is said. The same would apply to using a territorial accent or brogue. Making our readers understand what we are writing is paramount, and readers might unconsciously attribute an accent or way of speaking to a character who speaks a language. That could lead to confusion in the reader’s mind and cause them to stop reading. However, you are the author and must decide based on your preference.

Now you know what we think. Does it matter?

***************************************

We moved on to the reading portion of the meeting. Three of our writers had work to share for discussion and critique.

Leading off was Bruce Haedrich. His newest work is entitled Aquatania–The Silent Planet. After reading the opening at the last meeting, Bruce received some suggestions and critiques about the opening scenes. Tonight, he presented the rewrite of the first two chapters. This time, the work received only a few minor suggestions and reads much better in our minds.

 

Don Westerfield is a poet’s poet. Reading two poems, his words struck home to all who heard them. In his work Tomorrow, we see things we wish we could have done and envision the hopes we might still accomplish. Entitled Another Me, the second work could have been written about any of us. On the surface exists a person whose outward persona is who we are seen as, but inside, dwelling deep within, is another person. One who secretly wants to live a different life, be it good or bad, doesn’t matter; it’s different from our life.

 

While recuperating at home, James Kelly had plenty of time to write. Tonight, he brought the latest chapter from his McKinzie clan saga. Entitled, Ranch Hands, Renegades, and Rich Men. Meeting in a Washington D.C. Hotel, Asst. Secretary of the Navy Theodore Roosevelt meets with Coronel, soon to be General, Lenord Wood, the leader of the U.S. Army’s forces preparing to attack the Spanish troops in Cuba during the Spanish-American War. Roosevelt is seeking permission to form an outfit that later became known as The Rough Riders. Jim’s research is exhaustive. He writes the story as it happened concerning the actual characters in his tale. He inserts characters like the award-winning author John Jakes. Jim tells a story instead of writing a history book. By the way, John Jakes died here in Sarasota on March 11, 2023. He was ninety years old.

 

We adjourned a little early, but it was a productive evening, and we look forward to our next meeting on September 20. If you write, remember to READ, and KEEP ON WRITING!

 

August 16, 2023

It’s hot and raining, but seven intrepid writers showed up for our meeting tonight. The pre-meeting conversation allowed us to catch up on our latest projects outside of writing. We are a busy lot. Our co-host, Ernie Ovitz, could not attend tonight, and we missed him.

 

Leading off the reading portion of the meeting was Don Westerfield. He read two poems. His style and use of words have always amazed me, and tonight was no exception. Don’s first offering was Dementia, a “poem that hits close to home;

“I thought I saw her again today,

her face admidst the crowd,

a young girl from my yesterday.

She looks as if she’s proud,”

 are the opening lines of a poem that grab your heart. Before reading the second poem, Night Walker, Don explained, “My poems are not from personal experience. They are fiction.” A man wanders at the edge of the deep bay and contemplates his demise. Does he or doesn’t he?

 

Aquatania – The Silent Planet is a new work by Bruce Haedrich. After reading the first portion of the story, Bruce received several suggestions on how to draw in his readers on the first page. Two threads are immediately noted: an aerospace company is embarking on a massive project, and a romance is blooming. I wonder what can go wrong with these situations.

 

As Richard Cope took the floor, we waited to hear his work. What would it be? Prose? Poetry? Or maybe something else, a Screen Play? Three poems, The Eve of 69, let us feel the movement of time as years slipped by in his reading. Then we traveled to Venice, Italy, as he read The Bridge of Sighs. But the magic turned dark as the Devil whispered in the beguiling, Feed My Sheep.

 

It’s always interesting when you find your work in print, especially some older pieces you’d almost forgotten. Dennis Cathcart was given a pair of books, bound editions of the magazine House Plant. In the books, Dennis found work he’d written years earlier. “Sage Advice, Always Tell The Truth” tells of a time when a slight variation in a story caused a considerable misunderstanding. With a new book on the market, that advice is bearing fruit. His detailed stories leave no doubt as to how it happened.

 

Gary Conkol brings us a new story of a person named Ken who is invited to an unknown destination by someone named Al, not Alfred or Alyouish, just Al. Al was a man he’d only met once at a technical conference. Ken couldn’t know details except for a list of items to be packed into a single bag and when he must be ready to go. That information was posted on a website. Would you go? Will Ken go?

 

We have a lot to look forward to at the next meeting. Will we hear some more of these stories? Or will the authors read the same piece with a rewrite in place? It doesn’t matter; we’re here to help each other and always love to hear good writing. So, until next time, KEEP ON READING AND KEEP ON WRITING.