Showing posts with label Pat Patterson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pat Patterson. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 08, 2014
Pat Patterson releases "The Takers"
Congratulations to member Pat Patterson, who regularly makes the long trip to our meetings from Punta Gorda, on the publication of his new book, "The Takers." The historical fiction novel is available from both Create Space and Amazon. Great work, and many thanks to Pat for the kind acknowledgment of the Sarasota Writers Group.
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Wednesday November 6, 2013 Meeting
Last week many of us hoped to see Kerri Dieffenwierth so that we'd have an opportunity to congratulate her on her most recent accomplishments. Kerri recently won the 2013 Creative Nonfiction Contests Judge's Selection in Still - the journal for her piece called A New Bitterroot. She was also a finalist for the 2013 VanderMey non-fiction prize in Ruminate Magazine for her submission, Swamp Angel Stomp. Unfortunately, she was unable to be there, but we still cheered her in spirit.
Also, a friendly reminder.... our annual Christmas Party is scheduled for Wednesday, December 18th. Families are welcome. Everyone is encouraged to bring some festive food to share with the group. Any leftovers will be given to our gracious hosts, the Nokomis Fire Department. Also, if you haven't contributed to the room fund, please feel free to hand your donation to George as we'll be presenting it to the fire department on the day of the party.
George Mindling, author of U.S. Air Force Tactical Missiles, was our first reader. He shared with us an old treasure he found while going through some of his old projects and found a piece about a conversation with Shirley MacLaine. In his story he documents a call in to a local radio show where Shirley was the guest. As the call came from his home (and his daughter), he was prompted to record it for posterity purposes. The subject brought up by his daughter on the call was the metaphysical and pets. I don't think it surprised anyone to hear that the subject matter was too complex for a mere call in to the radio show. The cheekily dry humor at a celebrity giving spiritual advice was fabulously spot on.
Next, Kitt Crescendo shared her poem, Brave, about personal strength, compelled by the bullying situation that hit the headlines based on the situation in the Miami Dolphins locker room. The topic sparked a lively discussion surrounding what peoples' perceptions of bullying are as well as how to respond to bullying (and our personal responsibility to be stand up for ourselves).
Pat Patterson followed with a big thank you to the folks who gave him critique on his manuscript. Included on his list were Ernie, Ed, Don, JoAnne, Jack and Peter. He also shared his discovery of a software program called Clear Edits that assisted him with both line and content edits for his WIP. The cost is $80 and comes with email support. Instead of sharing from his manuscript, Pat has boldly branched out with his writing into the world of poetry. He wrote a lovely piece called "To My Grandson" where he answers the boy's question about where the wind comes from. His second poem was simply called "Dan", a loving tribute to the brother he lost and the son he gained who honors his name.
Our next reader, George Collias, author of Sandspurs: Limericks by a Native Floridian and Myahmuh: A Novel of Miami, Florida read an excerpt from the latter book. In this part we are introduced to a murderer through the eyes of a dead boy's ghost as he performs his rituals of putting cigarette burns on the body of his victim post mortem. The tone is definitely eerie and leaves us wondering how this horrible criminal will be caught.
Ernie Ovitz follows with some information surrounding how he researched his book and characters. He explained that his best sources of information were on descriptions he found of Armenia and the great persecution in 301 AD that were outside the traditional text books/history books/encyclopedias. He then continued on to Chapter 5 of his WIP in which the ambassador finds out that his wife has been kidnapped and makes plans to give chase to get her back.
Our in house comedian, Ed Ellis, read a short story he wrote entitled "My Feathered Friend." In the story he talks about the ice shanty he and the other half of his "honey do" twins build together. Their whole goal in building this fancy shanty was to drink Wild Turkey and escape their wives and the "honey do" lists that went with them. Once it was complete, their days were filled with the three "F"s. Fishing, Football and Feathers...until the blizzard that came that winter. The cold combined with the turkey caused them to hallucinate bikini clad co-eds out on the ice. As is always the case with an Ed Ellis story, the ending wasn't that simple...or that boring. The punchline came when the "honey do" twins discovered their missed opportunity. They found out that the co-eds weren't hallucinations at all, but participants in a contest held by the local radio station.
The sweetly soft spoken Barbara Frickel took a turn at sharing next. Het two pieces were inspired by her meditations (along with her mother's birthday) and magic pencils (her magical version of colored pencils). Her first piece was a dedication to her mom called "The Color of Comfort". For Barbara, the color umber reminds her of softness and warmth...and her mother. The second was called "My Tree" and was written while at Myakka Lake looking at her tree and meditating. To her, that tree spoke of strength, friendship and a promise of good times. Between the art work and photo and Barbara's sweet words, she warmed our hearts and left us smiling.
Don Westerfield wrote a couple of poems to honor those like him who served our country well as we headed towards the Veterans Day holiday. The two poems were entitled "The American Fighting Man" and "Fields of Stone." Both of his poems were powerful pieces for different reasons, so I selected one to share on the blog.
She read from her current work in progress, "Matrix of Life". The chapter she shared with us was called "Legion" and surrounded a special gift that the local chapter of the American Legion and their gift to her grandfather. In honor of all his years of dedication the guys gave him a hunting dog (a beagle) named Legion. As often happens in these more humorous moments in her book, humor and chaos ensued as the "hunting" dog became spoiled and babied under her grandfather's "watchful" eye. Laughter filled our meeting as JoAnne described the day that Legion stole the "turkey-duck-chicken" (the turducken moniker came much later with John Madden and the turkey bowls) her grandmother had prepared for Thanksgiving dinner, managing to eat a large portion before it could be saved.
Suzi Lynch, one of our newer members, decided to be bold and share a trilogy of poems she'd written a few years back for us. "Why I Don't Write or This Will Be On Your Permanent Record" was a powerful piece where she explored her fears of being published and how, in her mind at that moment in time, being unpublished also felt like being protected...from critics, reviewers and from the world at large. Her follow up, "No Love Lost" explored how when dreams come true (in this case, her classroom curriculum), it could be taken and changed and turned into anything...possibly even something completely different from what she'd intended. In her final piece, "A Happy Pregnancy", she discussed the hope, potential and something greater than herself growing within her writing...and that as long as she chose to hold it within and "not deliver" it, her thoughts, her writing was safe. Her three poems were powerful pieces to which every writer, artist or creator can relate. The strength of her voice was beautiful even as it probed insecurities and fears.
Andrew Parker introduced us to his newest WIP, a piece called "Playing Chess at 91." The first character we meet is the protagonist, Simon Shuster. He lives in a rent controlled boardinghouse filled with other senior citizens who do a lot of drugs (which he doesn't partake in) and "brownies" (which he does). They spend the larger part of their days playing chess while under the influence. Their handyman is over 100 and on crack. There are only 2 younger people who live in this house with them. One is in charge of their "nutrition" and the other "therapy." We're still unsure where Andrew's piece is going to take us, but one thing is guaranteed. Laughter and the outrageous will follow. It's one of the joys of hearing Andrew's work.
Our final reader for the night was Jung Suk Yo, back from his recent hiatus from our group. He shared a chapter from his current WIP called "In the Boat" where he described a frightening scene where his protagonist, Bach (a lawyer) is kidnapped by two masked men from his home in Florida where he'd been hiding and brought out to a ship in the Gulf of Mexico. Bound and gagged, he's uncertain if they came for him because the billionaire whose wife he'd been sleeping with found out about their nefarious plan to kill him with an insulin overdose or if it was something else entirely. It definitely left us a bit chilled and nervous about walking out into the dark Florida night to go home.
Also, a friendly reminder.... our annual Christmas Party is scheduled for Wednesday, December 18th. Families are welcome. Everyone is encouraged to bring some festive food to share with the group. Any leftovers will be given to our gracious hosts, the Nokomis Fire Department. Also, if you haven't contributed to the room fund, please feel free to hand your donation to George as we'll be presenting it to the fire department on the day of the party.
George Mindling, author of U.S. Air Force Tactical Missiles, was our first reader. He shared with us an old treasure he found while going through some of his old projects and found a piece about a conversation with Shirley MacLaine. In his story he documents a call in to a local radio show where Shirley was the guest. As the call came from his home (and his daughter), he was prompted to record it for posterity purposes. The subject brought up by his daughter on the call was the metaphysical and pets. I don't think it surprised anyone to hear that the subject matter was too complex for a mere call in to the radio show. The cheekily dry humor at a celebrity giving spiritual advice was fabulously spot on.
Next, Kitt Crescendo shared her poem, Brave, about personal strength, compelled by the bullying situation that hit the headlines based on the situation in the Miami Dolphins locker room. The topic sparked a lively discussion surrounding what peoples' perceptions of bullying are as well as how to respond to bullying (and our personal responsibility to be stand up for ourselves).
Pat Patterson followed with a big thank you to the folks who gave him critique on his manuscript. Included on his list were Ernie, Ed, Don, JoAnne, Jack and Peter. He also shared his discovery of a software program called Clear Edits that assisted him with both line and content edits for his WIP. The cost is $80 and comes with email support. Instead of sharing from his manuscript, Pat has boldly branched out with his writing into the world of poetry. He wrote a lovely piece called "To My Grandson" where he answers the boy's question about where the wind comes from. His second poem was simply called "Dan", a loving tribute to the brother he lost and the son he gained who honors his name.
Ernie Ovitz follows with some information surrounding how he researched his book and characters. He explained that his best sources of information were on descriptions he found of Armenia and the great persecution in 301 AD that were outside the traditional text books/history books/encyclopedias. He then continued on to Chapter 5 of his WIP in which the ambassador finds out that his wife has been kidnapped and makes plans to give chase to get her back.
Our in house comedian, Ed Ellis, read a short story he wrote entitled "My Feathered Friend." In the story he talks about the ice shanty he and the other half of his "honey do" twins build together. Their whole goal in building this fancy shanty was to drink Wild Turkey and escape their wives and the "honey do" lists that went with them. Once it was complete, their days were filled with the three "F"s. Fishing, Football and Feathers...until the blizzard that came that winter. The cold combined with the turkey caused them to hallucinate bikini clad co-eds out on the ice. As is always the case with an Ed Ellis story, the ending wasn't that simple...or that boring. The punchline came when the "honey do" twins discovered their missed opportunity. They found out that the co-eds weren't hallucinations at all, but participants in a contest held by the local radio station.
The sweetly soft spoken Barbara Frickel took a turn at sharing next. Het two pieces were inspired by her meditations (along with her mother's birthday) and magic pencils (her magical version of colored pencils). Her first piece was a dedication to her mom called "The Color of Comfort". For Barbara, the color umber reminds her of softness and warmth...and her mother. The second was called "My Tree" and was written while at Myakka Lake looking at her tree and meditating. To her, that tree spoke of strength, friendship and a promise of good times. Between the art work and photo and Barbara's sweet words, she warmed our hearts and left us smiling.
Don Westerfield wrote a couple of poems to honor those like him who served our country well as we headed towards the Veterans Day holiday. The two poems were entitled "The American Fighting Man" and "Fields of Stone." Both of his poems were powerful pieces for different reasons, so I selected one to share on the blog.
Fields of Stone
Taps ever echo o'er this hallowed place.
Flags adorn where fallen heroes lie in grace.
Here, each dawn reveals an alabaster glow
of white stones in perfect patterns, set
Row on row.
They honor those who served this country well,
reminding us why; why each hero fell.
On each stone a name, for Ages to cite;
memories etched in glory on a field of
White on white
Letters spell only of who the grave;
Even requiems can't acknowledge all they gave.
Our tears yet flow like the blood most shed
upon foreign shores where they
Bled and bled.
Not for self, did they fight and die,
but for country and all; now in peace they lie.
They paid freedom's toll and so here they bide
under silent white sentinels, resting
Side by side.
Followed by Don's patriotic and heartfelt words was JoAnne Phillips, author of Adventures of a Sea Hag.
She read from her current work in progress, "Matrix of Life". The chapter she shared with us was called "Legion" and surrounded a special gift that the local chapter of the American Legion and their gift to her grandfather. In honor of all his years of dedication the guys gave him a hunting dog (a beagle) named Legion. As often happens in these more humorous moments in her book, humor and chaos ensued as the "hunting" dog became spoiled and babied under her grandfather's "watchful" eye. Laughter filled our meeting as JoAnne described the day that Legion stole the "turkey-duck-chicken" (the turducken moniker came much later with John Madden and the turkey bowls) her grandmother had prepared for Thanksgiving dinner, managing to eat a large portion before it could be saved.
Suzi Lynch, one of our newer members, decided to be bold and share a trilogy of poems she'd written a few years back for us. "Why I Don't Write or This Will Be On Your Permanent Record" was a powerful piece where she explored her fears of being published and how, in her mind at that moment in time, being unpublished also felt like being protected...from critics, reviewers and from the world at large. Her follow up, "No Love Lost" explored how when dreams come true (in this case, her classroom curriculum), it could be taken and changed and turned into anything...possibly even something completely different from what she'd intended. In her final piece, "A Happy Pregnancy", she discussed the hope, potential and something greater than herself growing within her writing...and that as long as she chose to hold it within and "not deliver" it, her thoughts, her writing was safe. Her three poems were powerful pieces to which every writer, artist or creator can relate. The strength of her voice was beautiful even as it probed insecurities and fears.
Andrew Parker introduced us to his newest WIP, a piece called "Playing Chess at 91." The first character we meet is the protagonist, Simon Shuster. He lives in a rent controlled boardinghouse filled with other senior citizens who do a lot of drugs (which he doesn't partake in) and "brownies" (which he does). They spend the larger part of their days playing chess while under the influence. Their handyman is over 100 and on crack. There are only 2 younger people who live in this house with them. One is in charge of their "nutrition" and the other "therapy." We're still unsure where Andrew's piece is going to take us, but one thing is guaranteed. Laughter and the outrageous will follow. It's one of the joys of hearing Andrew's work.
Our final reader for the night was Jung Suk Yo, back from his recent hiatus from our group. He shared a chapter from his current WIP called "In the Boat" where he described a frightening scene where his protagonist, Bach (a lawyer) is kidnapped by two masked men from his home in Florida where he'd been hiding and brought out to a ship in the Gulf of Mexico. Bound and gagged, he's uncertain if they came for him because the billionaire whose wife he'd been sleeping with found out about their nefarious plan to kill him with an insulin overdose or if it was something else entirely. It definitely left us a bit chilled and nervous about walking out into the dark Florida night to go home.
Saturday, October 05, 2013
Wednesday September 18, 2013 Meeting
Sorry for the delay, everyone. I know we're a meeting behind, but we'll have everything caught up by the end of this week. Life has been a bit hectic as of late...but I figured better late than never!
As usual, Rod DiGruttolo did a great job moderating our meeting.
We were thrilled to welcome back Jim Kelly from his hiatus to the north, so we asked him to kick off our meeting. As usual, he didn't disappoint. First he shared a letter Irv Newman had written to a woman named Gail at the local paper from his home area of Surf City, NJ called The Sandpaper. In this letter he discussed how grateful he was to hospice and that it had extended his life. Recently they gave his wife the gift of 5 days off by coming to care for him so she could enjoy some free time. He donated his car and some money to Tidewell Hospice to thank them. In fact, as I wrote this blog and linked in Tidewell, I saw that Irv's story is featured on their website. As it's a YouTube Link, I thought you guys might want to see...
Jim ended his time with a poem he wrote while back at his old stomping grounds called "Goin' Home". It clearly depicted change...and how through the years, it's virtually impossible for anything to stay the same. I would have posted the poem, but I didn't get a chance to ask Jim for permission.
Ed Ellis shared a piece called "I Wish" as he celebrated his 50th anniversary from military discharge as well as honored those we lost on 9/11. In his piece he took a somber moment to reflect on war and make a wish for the wisdom of those who came before us. It was heartfelt and definitely a more sensitive side to our smarty pants prankster....but moving.
JoAnne Phillips, author of Adventures of a Sea Hag, read a chapter called "Religion and Communism" from her new work in progress, The Matrix of Life. In this chapter she talked about picking out a Christmas tree, befriending a goat named "Billy" who she treated as her pony and being a time of love and laughter. Her parents reconciled and remarried in the spring, moving them into a one bedroom storefront in town where the store window was painted to prevent people from being able to see inside. This was also when she was first introduced to McCarthyism. It didn't take any stretch of the imagination for anyone in the group to figure out that this spelled trouble for the precocious, young JoAnne....and we were right.
Pat Patterson came up next. Rather than read from his manuscript The Takers, he shared some valuable insights he's gained in his writing journey. He realized that editing is not exactly what he thought it was. Once he completed writing his manuscript, he made the assumption (incorrectly) that he could hire an editor, get the editor to unravel the "tangled ball of yarn" that was his story and fix his errors, then receive his work, ready for publication. Instead, he found that errors are costly and that it's never a good idea to send a first draft off to an editor. The time to submit to an editor is when you've polished it as much as you possibly can and you need some assistance on the finer points. So, he printed off a chapter and handed it to the group with a request for feedback and support.
Don Westerfield went back to his poetry roots with two pieces. One was called ODE to SEA GRASS which was a lovely piece that brought us back to nature and our small part in it. The other one got folks talking, so I thought I'd share it here. (We also learned the difference between an elegy and a eulogy. ;-))
When I had feet me shoes were yellow
ah yellow as pollen they were
as bright as lemons
bright as me lad's smile
bold as his laugh
an oh how I danced in me shoes
all night
a swarm a bees drunk from the flowers
sportin their yellow pants an boots
knew not as many turns as me lad an me
not have as many
an when in the slow river a bare foot
we went a wadin me lad an me
an bare we were from toe to head
a hand an hand
me yellow shoes were glad to wait
all hodge podge with his
for shoes has no need a feet
though feet has a need a them
but now old as I be I has no need a shoes
not yellow not brown
but glad I am glad as I was when I was a lass
for I got me a lad an I rather him than me feet.
Ernie Ovitz went next, sharing more from his work The Seventh King. In this chapter, Theodorus is thrown into jail for his beliefs in Christianity. He attempts to continue sharing his message only to realize he's not alone in his cell and that the other guy, hidden by shadows, is a bit scary. Ernie left us wondering as to the identity of the mystery man and how he ties to the unrest that seems to be steadily increasing with every chapter.
Jenny Oberg, inspired by the work of Deepak Choprah, wrote a piece of nature poetry that sparked some spunky debate amongst her listeners. Jenny wrote her piece about majestic creatures from awed eyes, pointing out how although many of them appear the same, they're all different. Some of the listeners find beauty in the Darwinistic tendencies of animals and the very literal and real battles that occur in nature. Others felt just as passionately that they'd rather see it from a starry-eyed, idealistic vision of grace and majesty.
Barry Mick took our feedback from the previous meeting and touched up his work in progress, roughly titled "Dragonfly". The general feedback was that the flow of the story now had a nice, smooth rhythm. We look forward to hearing more about his dragonfly...as the feeling that it is symbolic for something much deeper comes through loud and clear.
Beth Rice, Author of I'm Adopted, I'm Special along with her blog, Animal Tales, read a very powerful chapter she called "Job Hunt" from her work in progress, Pawprints Are Forever. In it, we find the heroine at a plant nursery, reminiscing about joyful times spent there with her family and quickly realize that it had been her family's business. Heartbroken, they are closing the doors for the last time. In their line of work, it was virtually impossible to compete with the big business companies. It's also the first time she sees her husband, the man who has always been her rock, completely devastated. As she'd been discussing creating a hook and positioning of her book, we firmly felt that THIS should be her beginning...and a very strong hook. This part definitely left many of us emotionally impacted and devastated on the protagonist's behalf.
One of our newer members, Patrick Hurley, finally decided to be bold and stepped forward to read a character sketch he'd written about a female character from the island of Petite Marie known only as Patrice. Beautiful and a bit mercenary, she'll do whatever it takes to avoid becoming an average local. She wants power and wealth and she's willing to do whatever it takes to get there...including a bit of drug trafficking. This character definitely has a lot of potential. We can't wait to see how she is weaved into the plot he's creating in his head.
Andrew Parker ended our meeting in his inimitable fashion, by introducing us to his newest work in progress that he is tentatively calling I'm Drunk and I'm Calling From A Payphone In London. The unique creation occurred when he'd passingly mentioned it in a profile he'd created for himself, causing a reader to email him asking where he could purchase this book as it sounded very interesting. True to Andrew's personality, he decided to make the story a reality. In the first chapter we're introduced to a drunk homeless man named George Lissman who'd fallen on hard times after his inability to quit alcohol caused him to lose his job as a conductor for an orchestra. Every night he sits in a bar where he drinks, then drunk dials random phone numbers. On this particular night, someone answered... Her name is Jacqueline Aurora. Let's just say that hilarity ensued. Once Andrew finished reading, everyone was leaving with either a belly ache or wiping away tears.
Thanks again to everyone for their wonderful contributions!
As usual, Rod DiGruttolo did a great job moderating our meeting.
We were thrilled to welcome back Jim Kelly from his hiatus to the north, so we asked him to kick off our meeting. As usual, he didn't disappoint. First he shared a letter Irv Newman had written to a woman named Gail at the local paper from his home area of Surf City, NJ called The Sandpaper. In this letter he discussed how grateful he was to hospice and that it had extended his life. Recently they gave his wife the gift of 5 days off by coming to care for him so she could enjoy some free time. He donated his car and some money to Tidewell Hospice to thank them. In fact, as I wrote this blog and linked in Tidewell, I saw that Irv's story is featured on their website. As it's a YouTube Link, I thought you guys might want to see...
Jim ended his time with a poem he wrote while back at his old stomping grounds called "Goin' Home". It clearly depicted change...and how through the years, it's virtually impossible for anything to stay the same. I would have posted the poem, but I didn't get a chance to ask Jim for permission.
Ed Ellis shared a piece called "I Wish" as he celebrated his 50th anniversary from military discharge as well as honored those we lost on 9/11. In his piece he took a somber moment to reflect on war and make a wish for the wisdom of those who came before us. It was heartfelt and definitely a more sensitive side to our smarty pants prankster....but moving.
JoAnne Phillips, author of Adventures of a Sea Hag, read a chapter called "Religion and Communism" from her new work in progress, The Matrix of Life. In this chapter she talked about picking out a Christmas tree, befriending a goat named "Billy" who she treated as her pony and being a time of love and laughter. Her parents reconciled and remarried in the spring, moving them into a one bedroom storefront in town where the store window was painted to prevent people from being able to see inside. This was also when she was first introduced to McCarthyism. It didn't take any stretch of the imagination for anyone in the group to figure out that this spelled trouble for the precocious, young JoAnne....and we were right.
Pat Patterson came up next. Rather than read from his manuscript The Takers, he shared some valuable insights he's gained in his writing journey. He realized that editing is not exactly what he thought it was. Once he completed writing his manuscript, he made the assumption (incorrectly) that he could hire an editor, get the editor to unravel the "tangled ball of yarn" that was his story and fix his errors, then receive his work, ready for publication. Instead, he found that errors are costly and that it's never a good idea to send a first draft off to an editor. The time to submit to an editor is when you've polished it as much as you possibly can and you need some assistance on the finer points. So, he printed off a chapter and handed it to the group with a request for feedback and support.
Don Westerfield went back to his poetry roots with two pieces. One was called ODE to SEA GRASS which was a lovely piece that brought us back to nature and our small part in it. The other one got folks talking, so I thought I'd share it here. (We also learned the difference between an elegy and a eulogy. ;-))
then will the trees sing
wandered long
have i these mortal woods
down worn trails of tears and laughter
step by searching step i trod
pathways that split and split again
those chosen roads of faulted time
soon to forget my passage
but if ever the soul survives
the strife of its mere existence
these woods will always know the truth
as the breath of life expends
when evening is nigh
then will the trees sing
my elegy
Kitt Crescendo finally shared the beginning to one of her works in progress, Three For All. She needed to read it out loud in front of an audience to hear some spots that might be a bit rough. She was able to pick a couple of errors out for herself, and with the help of the team, also caught a couple of repetitive words. Someone also commented that there seemed to be a lot of body parts slipping on each other thanks to the suntan oil. We weren't sure whether or not that was necessarily a bad thing as she is writing an erotic piece.
Asha Anderson came one last time before she headed off to Asia for a year. She and her lovely poetry will be missed, but we have high hopes that once she returns from her adventures abroad, that she will come find us again. In a writing class back in Ashland, OR 1988, she was challenged to write a piece with a specific subject in mind. This is the poem I elected to post because the playful whimsy drew me in...and I could almost hear a Scottish or Irish accent reading the piece.
YELLOW SHOES
When I had feet me shoes were yellow
ah yellow as pollen they were
as bright as lemons
bright as me lad's smile
bold as his laugh
an oh how I danced in me shoes
all night
a swarm a bees drunk from the flowers
sportin their yellow pants an boots
knew not as many turns as me lad an me
not have as many
an when in the slow river a bare foot
we went a wadin me lad an me
an bare we were from toe to head
a hand an hand
me yellow shoes were glad to wait
all hodge podge with his
for shoes has no need a feet
though feet has a need a them
but now old as I be I has no need a shoes
not yellow not brown
but glad I am glad as I was when I was a lass
for I got me a lad an I rather him than me feet.
Ernie Ovitz went next, sharing more from his work The Seventh King. In this chapter, Theodorus is thrown into jail for his beliefs in Christianity. He attempts to continue sharing his message only to realize he's not alone in his cell and that the other guy, hidden by shadows, is a bit scary. Ernie left us wondering as to the identity of the mystery man and how he ties to the unrest that seems to be steadily increasing with every chapter.
Jenny Oberg, inspired by the work of Deepak Choprah, wrote a piece of nature poetry that sparked some spunky debate amongst her listeners. Jenny wrote her piece about majestic creatures from awed eyes, pointing out how although many of them appear the same, they're all different. Some of the listeners find beauty in the Darwinistic tendencies of animals and the very literal and real battles that occur in nature. Others felt just as passionately that they'd rather see it from a starry-eyed, idealistic vision of grace and majesty.
Barry Mick took our feedback from the previous meeting and touched up his work in progress, roughly titled "Dragonfly". The general feedback was that the flow of the story now had a nice, smooth rhythm. We look forward to hearing more about his dragonfly...as the feeling that it is symbolic for something much deeper comes through loud and clear.
Beth Rice, Author of I'm Adopted, I'm Special along with her blog, Animal Tales, read a very powerful chapter she called "Job Hunt" from her work in progress, Pawprints Are Forever. In it, we find the heroine at a plant nursery, reminiscing about joyful times spent there with her family and quickly realize that it had been her family's business. Heartbroken, they are closing the doors for the last time. In their line of work, it was virtually impossible to compete with the big business companies. It's also the first time she sees her husband, the man who has always been her rock, completely devastated. As she'd been discussing creating a hook and positioning of her book, we firmly felt that THIS should be her beginning...and a very strong hook. This part definitely left many of us emotionally impacted and devastated on the protagonist's behalf.
One of our newer members, Patrick Hurley, finally decided to be bold and stepped forward to read a character sketch he'd written about a female character from the island of Petite Marie known only as Patrice. Beautiful and a bit mercenary, she'll do whatever it takes to avoid becoming an average local. She wants power and wealth and she's willing to do whatever it takes to get there...including a bit of drug trafficking. This character definitely has a lot of potential. We can't wait to see how she is weaved into the plot he's creating in his head.
Andrew Parker ended our meeting in his inimitable fashion, by introducing us to his newest work in progress that he is tentatively calling I'm Drunk and I'm Calling From A Payphone In London. The unique creation occurred when he'd passingly mentioned it in a profile he'd created for himself, causing a reader to email him asking where he could purchase this book as it sounded very interesting. True to Andrew's personality, he decided to make the story a reality. In the first chapter we're introduced to a drunk homeless man named George Lissman who'd fallen on hard times after his inability to quit alcohol caused him to lose his job as a conductor for an orchestra. Every night he sits in a bar where he drinks, then drunk dials random phone numbers. On this particular night, someone answered... Her name is Jacqueline Aurora. Let's just say that hilarity ensued. Once Andrew finished reading, everyone was leaving with either a belly ache or wiping away tears.
Thanks again to everyone for their wonderful contributions!
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Wednesday September 4, 2013 Meeting
Our meeting commenced promptly at 6:30. Rod DiGruttolo, our moderator for the evening, introduced Peter Frickel to the group, though he needed no introduction with us.
Author of Lotha and the Three Crosses and My Frog Sings along with his blog, iThink, his pieces are looked forward to for their imagery (never mind his gorgeous South African lilt).
As per last meeting's announcements, Peter kicked off our discussion regarding sentence, paragraph and page construction. He kicked it off by letting us imagine Pooh and Peter in conversation where Pooh says, "Tell me where the sentence lives.."
And then he laid out his challenge.
"What makes a sentence? Do you know the different kinds of sentences?"
As he spent the evening breaking down the various forms of sentences and their purposes...and how the right combination can create magic on a page, he pointed out a simple yet valuable fact.
"We talk too much, listen too little."
He encouraged us to find ways to inspire the senses. Music to inspire, Books of colors, images...senses.
We all came away enjoying the different outlooks and points of view that Peter offered into the way we hone our craft to constantly, consistently improve.
Our readings were kicked off by Susan Davis whose travelling gypsy spirit guided her to read from 100 Love Sonnets by Pablo Neruda. She chose to read #6. The pure beauty and passion made it easy to understand why she was inspired to share. Even more interesting was her story to go along with the poetry...when she told us of her tour of Neruda's home and the amazing view from his bedroom. The breathless natural beauty from his window combined with being in the great writer's home left her in awe.
Next, Ed Ellis read his very entertaining piece entitled "Awkward Encounter". It was a story of life after high school which included hanging out with Steve, his sidekick, cruising for chicks at "Bob's Big Boy" and some Mary Jane. Let's just say that after a bit of partying, one of the characters was uncertain if his trip to Disneyland was a dream or an actual occurrence. Yes, this piece had the whole group rolling with laughter at the characters' antics, the anticipation and the punch line.
Pat Patterson took on Rod's dialogue challenge. He called his piece "Two Old 1963 High School Class Buddies On The Telephone". In his piece we got the opportunity to hear two old friends wax nostalgic on the past and play catch up on life in general...and how their views of events had changed through the years.
Jeff Cochran read two pieces. The first was his dialogue challenge from Rod. He attributed his inspiration to Kitt's dialogue challenge from the prior meeting...and it didn't take any time at all to figure out why. With sentences like "Just slide it in" "Move it around a bit" and "I don't think that's going to fit", it was obvious that the dialogue included a lot of fun, tongue-in-cheek innuendo. What was it really about? A shoe sale, of course! His next piece was a poem he entitled "Seasons" that he'd written to celebrate an artist friend, Holly Lovely. His verses painted picturesque scenes and enabled the listener to feel each season...and appreciate how much he treasured his friend.
Our newcomer, Barry Mick, shared his piece called "Dragonfly". Although there was a literal dragonfly in his story, it became evident quickly that there was deep symbolism in that dragonfly. This is just the beginning of what we sense will be a very powerful story of love, loss and family. We can't wait to see where Barry takes his story.
Don Westerfield shared a short story he called "My Family Tree". He was researching a tale about his family tree and the family scandal that caused his grandpa to leave Kentucky and move to Indiana. To learn more about the roots of the tree in Kentucky, he headed back to where it all began and found his only remaining relative in town was the drunk guy he met on the corner. As he asked some former neighbors about what happened to his family, he was told..."Son, when you go digging for your roots, all you usually end up with is a can of worms." Yes, there was much laughter and applause that followed this entertaining short piece.
Ernie Ovitz continued with Chapter 2 if his WIP, "The Seventh King". In this part we're beginning to get a feel for the political savvy of Constantine, the Tribune, as he deals with General Decimus and his interview, hoping to learn more about the Emperor. In this part we also begin to get a better feel for Red Beard and why he's targeting them.
JoAnne Phillips, author of Adventures Of A Sea Hag continued with her current WIP, "The Matrix Of Life" with her next chapter entitled "Goodbye Mushy". In this chapter she talked about she and her mother living with her grandma who suffered from bipolar disorder, though it wasn't yet a diagnosis. There wasn't a dry eye in the house as she bravely shared the story about the puppy, Mushy, her mother's ex-boyfriend gave her and how she held it in her arms as she watched it die a horrible death at her grandmother's hand. The lethargy and inability to communicate and respond broke our hearts for her...and we were so relieved when she was placed back into the care of her grandparents on her father's side as she began her slow battle back toward healing. JoAnne's story has it's ups and downs, but the one constant is this... We're cheering for her!
Linda Shell was back with her YA Adventure about Gracie the dwarf kangaroo in "Come Along With Me". She had the group snorting with laughter at her clever turn of phrase, "Buster's last stand" as she told about the chicken who ran around with it's head cut off...spraying grandma's white, newly washed sheets that were hanging on the line with his blood. Guess that's what she gets for deciding to make him dinner. We're definitely looking forward to seeing where Gracie's adventure leads next.
Next came another excerpt from author of I'm Adopted, I'm Special and The Animal Tales blog, Beth Rice's newest WIP "Pawprints Are Forever". The next installment was called "Dr Anthony Vinelli". He wasn't the suave, handsome doc, but rather the smart, capable doc with the fabulous petside manner...who the techs didn't like much, but then...he made them work. He was also an avian specialist which meant he got to handle then snakes and their temperamental owners. He was also the resident "Friends" trivia guru and the favorite doctor for the protagonist. At this point, he was just introduced into the story along with a couple of patients who he's helped along the way, but we all sense that there's much more to their story and are looking forward to hearing it told.
As we closed out the night, we circled back to Peter. He shared with us a piece he'd written about a river called "There Runs A River". Although it was ultimately about the river, it was about so much more. It was symbolic of time and how, like a river, they both change everything as they move. He also shared some of his own poetry. With his permission, here's his piece.
The Pathway
The single line pathway
Moved humans
Carrying empty pails of sorrowed hunger
And despair they should never have owned.
Some brought extended bellies
Swollen lips and cleaved tongues,
Others empty eyes,
Faces cracked
Scabbed skin
Where tears had dried.
And the dogs
That came on burnt paws,
Pulled tails across stones,
Whimpered for those they left to die.
We walked
Slowly
Into miles,
To the horizon,
To a town.
Some groaned
Stopped and dropped
With voices that gurgled
Between cracked lips
Before they died.
For each that crumpled
I bent down
Besides
With a prayer.
Pressed eye lids
Closed
With whites covered
Each rested
In their own dark
Our misery unwanted.
By the edge of the town
With thinned ranks
We stood still,
To feel the pain
To let it run away.
To remember friends and family
Who like fallen sign posts
Now mark our way.
Lying lost upon acarpous soil
They tell others
Who seek shelter,
"It doesn't hurt anymore."
As always, Sarasota Writers Group had a great night of eclectic reading and look forward to our next meeting on 9/18/2013.
Author of Lotha and the Three Crosses and My Frog Sings along with his blog, iThink, his pieces are looked forward to for their imagery (never mind his gorgeous South African lilt).
As per last meeting's announcements, Peter kicked off our discussion regarding sentence, paragraph and page construction. He kicked it off by letting us imagine Pooh and Peter in conversation where Pooh says, "Tell me where the sentence lives.."
And then he laid out his challenge.
"What makes a sentence? Do you know the different kinds of sentences?"
As he spent the evening breaking down the various forms of sentences and their purposes...and how the right combination can create magic on a page, he pointed out a simple yet valuable fact.
"We talk too much, listen too little."
He encouraged us to find ways to inspire the senses. Music to inspire, Books of colors, images...senses.
We all came away enjoying the different outlooks and points of view that Peter offered into the way we hone our craft to constantly, consistently improve.
Our readings were kicked off by Susan Davis whose travelling gypsy spirit guided her to read from 100 Love Sonnets by Pablo Neruda. She chose to read #6. The pure beauty and passion made it easy to understand why she was inspired to share. Even more interesting was her story to go along with the poetry...when she told us of her tour of Neruda's home and the amazing view from his bedroom. The breathless natural beauty from his window combined with being in the great writer's home left her in awe.
Next, Ed Ellis read his very entertaining piece entitled "Awkward Encounter". It was a story of life after high school which included hanging out with Steve, his sidekick, cruising for chicks at "Bob's Big Boy" and some Mary Jane. Let's just say that after a bit of partying, one of the characters was uncertain if his trip to Disneyland was a dream or an actual occurrence. Yes, this piece had the whole group rolling with laughter at the characters' antics, the anticipation and the punch line.
Pat Patterson took on Rod's dialogue challenge. He called his piece "Two Old 1963 High School Class Buddies On The Telephone". In his piece we got the opportunity to hear two old friends wax nostalgic on the past and play catch up on life in general...and how their views of events had changed through the years.
Jeff Cochran read two pieces. The first was his dialogue challenge from Rod. He attributed his inspiration to Kitt's dialogue challenge from the prior meeting...and it didn't take any time at all to figure out why. With sentences like "Just slide it in" "Move it around a bit" and "I don't think that's going to fit", it was obvious that the dialogue included a lot of fun, tongue-in-cheek innuendo. What was it really about? A shoe sale, of course! His next piece was a poem he entitled "Seasons" that he'd written to celebrate an artist friend, Holly Lovely. His verses painted picturesque scenes and enabled the listener to feel each season...and appreciate how much he treasured his friend.
Our newcomer, Barry Mick, shared his piece called "Dragonfly". Although there was a literal dragonfly in his story, it became evident quickly that there was deep symbolism in that dragonfly. This is just the beginning of what we sense will be a very powerful story of love, loss and family. We can't wait to see where Barry takes his story.
Don Westerfield shared a short story he called "My Family Tree". He was researching a tale about his family tree and the family scandal that caused his grandpa to leave Kentucky and move to Indiana. To learn more about the roots of the tree in Kentucky, he headed back to where it all began and found his only remaining relative in town was the drunk guy he met on the corner. As he asked some former neighbors about what happened to his family, he was told..."Son, when you go digging for your roots, all you usually end up with is a can of worms." Yes, there was much laughter and applause that followed this entertaining short piece.
Ernie Ovitz continued with Chapter 2 if his WIP, "The Seventh King". In this part we're beginning to get a feel for the political savvy of Constantine, the Tribune, as he deals with General Decimus and his interview, hoping to learn more about the Emperor. In this part we also begin to get a better feel for Red Beard and why he's targeting them.
JoAnne Phillips, author of Adventures Of A Sea Hag continued with her current WIP, "The Matrix Of Life" with her next chapter entitled "Goodbye Mushy". In this chapter she talked about she and her mother living with her grandma who suffered from bipolar disorder, though it wasn't yet a diagnosis. There wasn't a dry eye in the house as she bravely shared the story about the puppy, Mushy, her mother's ex-boyfriend gave her and how she held it in her arms as she watched it die a horrible death at her grandmother's hand. The lethargy and inability to communicate and respond broke our hearts for her...and we were so relieved when she was placed back into the care of her grandparents on her father's side as she began her slow battle back toward healing. JoAnne's story has it's ups and downs, but the one constant is this... We're cheering for her!
Linda Shell was back with her YA Adventure about Gracie the dwarf kangaroo in "Come Along With Me". She had the group snorting with laughter at her clever turn of phrase, "Buster's last stand" as she told about the chicken who ran around with it's head cut off...spraying grandma's white, newly washed sheets that were hanging on the line with his blood. Guess that's what she gets for deciding to make him dinner. We're definitely looking forward to seeing where Gracie's adventure leads next.
Next came another excerpt from author of I'm Adopted, I'm Special and The Animal Tales blog, Beth Rice's newest WIP "Pawprints Are Forever". The next installment was called "Dr Anthony Vinelli". He wasn't the suave, handsome doc, but rather the smart, capable doc with the fabulous petside manner...who the techs didn't like much, but then...he made them work. He was also an avian specialist which meant he got to handle then snakes and their temperamental owners. He was also the resident "Friends" trivia guru and the favorite doctor for the protagonist. At this point, he was just introduced into the story along with a couple of patients who he's helped along the way, but we all sense that there's much more to their story and are looking forward to hearing it told.
As we closed out the night, we circled back to Peter. He shared with us a piece he'd written about a river called "There Runs A River". Although it was ultimately about the river, it was about so much more. It was symbolic of time and how, like a river, they both change everything as they move. He also shared some of his own poetry. With his permission, here's his piece.
The Pathway
The single line pathway
Moved humans
Carrying empty pails of sorrowed hunger
And despair they should never have owned.
Some brought extended bellies
Swollen lips and cleaved tongues,
Others empty eyes,
Faces cracked
Scabbed skin
Where tears had dried.
And the dogs
That came on burnt paws,
Pulled tails across stones,
Whimpered for those they left to die.
We walked
Slowly
Into miles,
To the horizon,
To a town.
Some groaned
Stopped and dropped
With voices that gurgled
Between cracked lips
Before they died.
For each that crumpled
I bent down
Besides
With a prayer.
Pressed eye lids
Closed
With whites covered
Each rested
In their own dark
Our misery unwanted.
By the edge of the town
With thinned ranks
We stood still,
To feel the pain
To let it run away.
To remember friends and family
Who like fallen sign posts
Now mark our way.
Lying lost upon acarpous soil
They tell others
Who seek shelter,
"It doesn't hurt anymore."
As always, Sarasota Writers Group had a great night of eclectic reading and look forward to our next meeting on 9/18/2013.
Monday, July 22, 2013
Wednesday 7/17/2013
We kicked off our Wednesday meeting with 18 attendees and 13 readers. With George Mindling on vacation, the role of scribe was handed off to me, Kat Levato. Rod DiGruttolo, our fantastic facilitator, did a great job of keeping us moving and on point. He also laid out a challenge/project for the group. Write out a meaningful dialogue only story of 250 words or more! Folks are welcome to read them as they tackle this challenge.
Kitt Crescendo kicked off the evening with a new poem entitled "Passion's Flame" which spurned on a discussion revolving around love and passion and what inspires her.
Next, Peter Frickel read a chapter called "Big Fish" from his newest work project, a series about his travels of the breadth and width of Africa. In this piece he brought to light the battle between man and nature...more specifically, himself and a very large fish. As always, his words painted images in our minds. He drew us in, causing us to wonder about this battle from the fish's point of view. Was the fish seeking freedom or escape?
Jeff Cochran shared two pieces. The first was based on a writing project to evoke strong emotions called "Special Time". The surprise twist at the end definitely left people spooked and gasping in shock. His second reading was a continuation from his work in progress. The chapter called "Courtship" brought us back in time to when arranged marriages were the norm and young ladies were left to worry about the man their father would choose for them.
Ernie Ovitz continued with another excerpt from his manuscript, Seventh King. His research and flair for description had folks feeling hungry and wishing for a bit of venison and fresh bread!
Robert Taylor came back up from the Punta Gorda writers group and shared with us that his memoir, Hardship Post has been published! Congratulations to him! As he shared with us the first chapter, it was clear why he'd won the 2012 Royal Palm Literary award for unpublished memoir.
Pat Patterson read his epilogue. He's looking for critiques as he feels it's missing a little bit of oomph.
Don Westerfield read his most recent short story entitled "Conversation With Charlie". As is always the case with Don's work, it was heartfelt and had a few folks in the room grabbing for tissues as he shared a conversation between a man at the end of his life, talking to his best friend and his wife, both who have already gone.
Ed Ellis has been working on a non-fiction piece for a workshop entitled "The Seven Principles Of Practice". His piece had comments flowing about his knack for "intelligent" humor and discussing whether he should open with a quote on practice or stick to his own words. He, too, is looking for critique.
JoAnn Phillips shared two pieces. The first was a poem called "Faberge Egg". This poem was a bit of a shift from her normally humorous work as it focused on children and how devastating it is when they're only seen as a "thing" rather than the gifts to the world that they truly are. The next piece was a chapter from her book "Matrix of Life". This portion was mostly regarding her grandfather and how he related to the tragedy of Hiroshima....from the perspective of her 5 year old eyes. It was both painful and moving.
Susan Davis has made her triumphant return from her bike trip from Maine to Nova Scotia! We got to welcome her back and hear a bit about her travel adventure. The piece she shared with us was entitled "So Many Men, So Little Time". Sounds like a racy romance, doesn't it? Not only did she have us feeling muscle aches and pains from the steep hills she biked, she made us feel the rain pelting on her face and her meeting with the owner of a restaurant/hotel and the titillation of the potential love story between their waitress and the owner left untold as they headed back out for the open road.
Asha Anderson shared a booklet she made for the group containing several of her wonderfully descriptive poems. They left the group feeling uplifted and inspired.
Taking us back in time with her, Jenny Oberg shared with us how our senses can draw forth memories. On her way home from the last writers group she smelled the distinct odor of the Brazilian peppertree...and how it led her back to her childhood visits to Florida from Chicago. It definitely had a sweet, nostalgic vibe of youth.
Finishing off the night was Ron Badcock and a piece called "Yankee Station" set in Vietnam. Told as if by autobiography, he shared why volunteering once for a mission is plenty when you're at war.
We wrapped up on time and will reconvene on August 7th! Thanks again to those who participated.
Kitt Crescendo kicked off the evening with a new poem entitled "Passion's Flame" which spurned on a discussion revolving around love and passion and what inspires her.
Next, Peter Frickel read a chapter called "Big Fish" from his newest work project, a series about his travels of the breadth and width of Africa. In this piece he brought to light the battle between man and nature...more specifically, himself and a very large fish. As always, his words painted images in our minds. He drew us in, causing us to wonder about this battle from the fish's point of view. Was the fish seeking freedom or escape?
Jeff Cochran shared two pieces. The first was based on a writing project to evoke strong emotions called "Special Time". The surprise twist at the end definitely left people spooked and gasping in shock. His second reading was a continuation from his work in progress. The chapter called "Courtship" brought us back in time to when arranged marriages were the norm and young ladies were left to worry about the man their father would choose for them.
Ernie Ovitz continued with another excerpt from his manuscript, Seventh King. His research and flair for description had folks feeling hungry and wishing for a bit of venison and fresh bread!
Robert Taylor came back up from the Punta Gorda writers group and shared with us that his memoir, Hardship Post has been published! Congratulations to him! As he shared with us the first chapter, it was clear why he'd won the 2012 Royal Palm Literary award for unpublished memoir.
Pat Patterson read his epilogue. He's looking for critiques as he feels it's missing a little bit of oomph.
Don Westerfield read his most recent short story entitled "Conversation With Charlie". As is always the case with Don's work, it was heartfelt and had a few folks in the room grabbing for tissues as he shared a conversation between a man at the end of his life, talking to his best friend and his wife, both who have already gone.
Ed Ellis has been working on a non-fiction piece for a workshop entitled "The Seven Principles Of Practice". His piece had comments flowing about his knack for "intelligent" humor and discussing whether he should open with a quote on practice or stick to his own words. He, too, is looking for critique.
JoAnn Phillips shared two pieces. The first was a poem called "Faberge Egg". This poem was a bit of a shift from her normally humorous work as it focused on children and how devastating it is when they're only seen as a "thing" rather than the gifts to the world that they truly are. The next piece was a chapter from her book "Matrix of Life". This portion was mostly regarding her grandfather and how he related to the tragedy of Hiroshima....from the perspective of her 5 year old eyes. It was both painful and moving.
Susan Davis has made her triumphant return from her bike trip from Maine to Nova Scotia! We got to welcome her back and hear a bit about her travel adventure. The piece she shared with us was entitled "So Many Men, So Little Time". Sounds like a racy romance, doesn't it? Not only did she have us feeling muscle aches and pains from the steep hills she biked, she made us feel the rain pelting on her face and her meeting with the owner of a restaurant/hotel and the titillation of the potential love story between their waitress and the owner left untold as they headed back out for the open road.
Asha Anderson shared a booklet she made for the group containing several of her wonderfully descriptive poems. They left the group feeling uplifted and inspired.
Taking us back in time with her, Jenny Oberg shared with us how our senses can draw forth memories. On her way home from the last writers group she smelled the distinct odor of the Brazilian peppertree...and how it led her back to her childhood visits to Florida from Chicago. It definitely had a sweet, nostalgic vibe of youth.
Finishing off the night was Ron Badcock and a piece called "Yankee Station" set in Vietnam. Told as if by autobiography, he shared why volunteering once for a mission is plenty when you're at war.
We wrapped up on time and will reconvene on August 7th! Thanks again to those who participated.
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